Watson: Remember how much you hated that floor mat downstairs?  Well, I took care of it for you.  You're welcome.  Also, on a totally unrelated note, you probably need to vacuum.
Me: ...

Me: Will you just pee already so we can go in?  It's cold out here.
Watson: But I just found this stick, and you'll drag me inside as soon as I go.
Me: Well I'm going to drag you in soon even if you don't go.
Watson: Then I'll just pee inside.
Me: Then I'll rub your nose in it and throw you back outsi....oh.
Watson: Checkmate.  I'll be over here with my stick.